“I’ve never dated an exotic before, so this should be interesting.”
I was the first Black woman he ever dated, and man was he excited. After being married and divorced twice to two White women who simply laid in bed like a log, he thought he hit the jackpot.
I would’ve never known had he not “finally opened up to me.” When I confronted him about it, I said:
“I’m sure you don’t realize this, but that’s offensive. Especially to white women. You pretty much just compared POC women to a delicacy and White women to cardboard. I’m sure some POC’s would take that as a compliment, but I’m sure those women are just insecure and feel a need to be validated by a White male.”
Am I still dating him? Yes. Did I ignore what he said? Definitely not. He has one more chance to not act like a typical privileged White male.
Ignoring a statement like that is the same as accepting it. I refuse to act like it did not happen, but I do feel conflicted.
My area is not known to be the most diverse. What more can I expect from any online dating site that matches me with White males from this area? Statistically I am more likely to be the first African American woman most of these men have ever been interested in / talked to / dated. Therefore, the likelihood of one of them offending me with a statement like that is fairly high.
What’s an educated, open-minded, and cultured African-American woman to do? Keep spot treating such stains, or throw it all out together when I may just experience another issue like this?